Sunday, December 31, 2006

love, lost & found

its tat very last day.

the last day of 2006.

before today, i sorta thot of wat i'd reflect upon, write, and think back.

then suddenly, its less than 24hrs before the yr is officially over.

i guess i shld still somewhat reflect on the yr tat has been.

lets see.. this could take a while..eye massages will be good.

i know i was quite unhappy at work at the beginning of 2006. thankfully i had someone keeping me going, cheering me on, etc etc. but all good things must come to an end, albeit abit painfully.

so i fell in love, so i fell out of love. so i rediscovered the meaning of friendship, kinship. love hurts, love heals, love sucks, love never ceases to amaze me with what it can do to you. self love aside, we're so dependent on love from other ppl, even to the point of being captivated by the wonderful things it supposedly brings.

and so i went on a Journey, in search of self love. while i did let go of some thorny issues buried in the deep recesses of my memory, it also made me see that i had no excuse to not like myself. really..there's nothing wrong with me. even if there is, so? and then? watever la..

Having said tat, i still have lots to work on. self esteem, confidence, being better, growing up, blah blah blah.

But I guess I must have grown up over the past 12 months.

Nothing quite beats first hand experience. Its been quite a tiring walk with quite a few hard falls. work wise, its been ok. Got my raise, got to travel to indo, phil, hk, got to meet many ppl along the way. Got to know all my colleagues better, its really great when you get along with the ppl you work with. I’ve got an exception but oh well whatever. I’m still grateful for my bosses..who else gets personal sms bdae wishes fr the chairman fr the company?? I’m glad brad has been understanding and kept watch over us. I’m kinda still swimming ard in the dark.. being in charge of all the products of your company is kinda scary. Plus half the time I really don’t know wat I’m doing..jus using common sense to guide me thru and pure luck to get to the other end. Prob will have 2 portfolios next yr..pdts, plus sg office operations. Don’t really know wat to think of double workload and single pay tho. Haha.

2006 is very special to me.. cos I loved, lost & found.

Its also probably better know as ‘yun’s year of friends’. Made so many friends this yr, many of them whom were lost but found, others who were found, but there were also those who were lost.

For those 'found', thank you. I shant name names, but thank you for:


its also the yr of the firsts.. think i wrote something like tat before?

anyway, was my first time:


somehow I’ve been partying and going out an extraordinary amount. And traveling too. Basically, I’m rarely home. Which.. is neither good nor bad I guess? Jus tiring, sometimes abit empty. I know its been a painful yr for some of us.. i dont know if i've become more cynical or accepting, cos i have the 'oh well, watever la' mentality for almost all things. not much feeling, not much opinions or watsoever. depends on which perspective u are looking at it.

but i still like to think i've retained some semblance of hope.. hope tj recovers soon, hope whoever’s having a complicated life right now manages to solve things, hope all of us find happiness, hope things tat cause pain & unhappiness, turn out to be true blessings in disguise.

goodbye love, lost & found.

hello hope.

thinking out loud at 12:14 AM


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