Wednesday, November 19, 2008
mayday.
see picture finish liao, inspiration all gone and i'm back to being bored.
spent much of the week doing designing work, figuring out how to register for the exam and hanging out with lovely people like yi/leo and may whom i seldom meet but shall endeavour meet more. cant blame me for wanting to be in good company right.
may was asking how my birthday was after i left her to meet mymy and the rest and after recounting the dinner/surprise(S), she reminded me how sweet everyone was to bother planning surprises for me. and yep, to that i agree.
but more than that, i had many revelations talking to her. i realised how fast and much we've all grown up, how things have changed but yet still somehow stay the same, how bonds are forged and broken, about strength and overcoming all sorts of change, how beneath our exterior lies a past we cannot possibly fathom if not for sharing, precious little moments there were that shldnt ever be forsaked nor forgotten.
i dont know if i'd led a sheltered existence, or that my world consists of too many wolves, shadows, continual disappointments and freeloading/buay zi dong ppl (i'm still figuring out how to say it in proper english). it irks, saddens and tires me during these unfortunate encounters i'd really prefer to be kept at a really minimum minimum. of course thats just being naive and idealistic and the cold cold world will pop the bubble and scatter all happie fairydust-like things everywhere else but on my lil corner. since there arent many ppl ard you can trust or depend on these days, the more i shld trust in myself to make meself happie.
actually i dont really know wat i'm saying except that i'm glad for days and evenings like these and its nice being unassuming, uncomplicated and unpretentious, being with people simply cos you liked being around them and liked yourself much more being around them.
i know who i'm grateful for. i'm blessed, cos i've got u guys with me.
and yet, words just cannot describe the acute disappointment i'm feeling now. its a good lesson on how one shld be independent and not have any expectations of others at all.
ok. i got it.
spent much of the week doing designing work, figuring out how to register for the exam and hanging out with lovely people like yi/leo and may whom i seldom meet but shall endeavour meet more. cant blame me for wanting to be in good company right.
may was asking how my birthday was after i left her to meet mymy and the rest and after recounting the dinner/surprise(S), she reminded me how sweet everyone was to bother planning surprises for me. and yep, to that i agree.
but more than that, i had many revelations talking to her. i realised how fast and much we've all grown up, how things have changed but yet still somehow stay the same, how bonds are forged and broken, about strength and overcoming all sorts of change, how beneath our exterior lies a past we cannot possibly fathom if not for sharing, precious little moments there were that shldnt ever be forsaked nor forgotten.
i dont know if i'd led a sheltered existence, or that my world consists of too many wolves, shadows, continual disappointments and freeloading/buay zi dong ppl (i'm still figuring out how to say it in proper english). it irks, saddens and tires me during these unfortunate encounters i'd really prefer to be kept at a really minimum minimum. of course thats just being naive and idealistic and the cold cold world will pop the bubble and scatter all happie fairydust-like things everywhere else but on my lil corner. since there arent many ppl ard you can trust or depend on these days, the more i shld trust in myself to make meself happie.
actually i dont really know wat i'm saying except that i'm glad for days and evenings like these and its nice being unassuming, uncomplicated and unpretentious, being with people simply cos you liked being around them and liked yourself much more being around them.
i know who i'm grateful for. i'm blessed, cos i've got u guys with me.
and yet, words just cannot describe the acute disappointment i'm feeling now. its a good lesson on how one shld be independent and not have any expectations of others at all.
ok. i got it.
thinking out loud at 11:31 PM
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